One of Those Days
by Hobbster
Summary: ATF Agent Chris Larabee is having "one of those days" and Vin Tanner, then ultimately Ezra Standish, has to pay the price!
1. Chapter 1

With gratitude to MOG for the seven magnificent ATF agents!

One of Those Days

Chris Larabee was having "one of those days." The team's investigation into the murder of a key witness hit a brick wall. If the new Forensic Pathologist can't find any tangible evidence – that Larabee can understand, that is – the whole case was going down the toilet. Travis had been on his ass over a few "politically incorrect" statements he made about women in the police force and ATF, even though they weren't too bad until they were taken out of context by an over-eager news reporter. His team had been the brunt of a series of practical jokes that haven't been funny – dog crap in desk drawers, agents' pictures posted on singles' websites, etc. Tomorrow night's dinner honoring the mayor would normally not even be an inconvenience, but this time, all department heads and supervisors were REQUIRED to attend. Formal dinner – monkey suits – dancing.

And to put the icing on the cake, today was Larabee's birthday, and he was spending it in his office trying to finish some paper work and waiting for that damn Forensic Pathologist to explain his findings in medical double talk. The rest of the team was probably in the saloon enjoying the stripper Buck hired for Chris'.

The knock on his open door alerted Chris Larabee to a visitor. As he looked up, a soft, "Shit," escaped his lips. _I told them that I didn't want a stripper in the office! Damn, they never listen! _

The beautiful woman entered with an alluring smile. She had auburn hair piled on her head with wisps framing her face. She wore a smart suit; the jacket accentuated her small waist and generous bust, but stopped short of revealing any cleavage. The skirt was short and form-fitting, but tasteful. She was a little shorter than he preferred, but well proportioned. She marched directly to his desk and extended her hand. "Agent Larabee, please call me KC (Casey). I think I can make you a very happy man!" she said excitedly as she placed a large envelope and a small cassette player on his desk.

Chris rose immediately pulling his wallet from his back pocket and removing a fifty dollar bill. "Sorry, little lady, you're beautiful and sexy and you might be just what I need today, but not here and not now," he said as he took her extended hand, turned it palm upward and piled the envelope and cassette player on it. He came around to the front of the desk, put one hand on the back of her neck and kissed her full on the lips as he turned her toward the door. He pushed her to the exit as he shoved the fifty down the front of her jacket into her bra. "That's for your trouble." Then he propelled her out the door with a swat to her backside and slammed the office door behind her.

The bullpen was empty except for Vin Tanner. He couldn't abandon Larabee on his birthday; maybe they could have a few beers before going home.

The woman stood outside Larabee's door with her eyes wide, gasping for breath and a shocked expression on her face. Vin cautiously approached the woman and said, "Special Agent Vin Tanner. May I help you?"

"Do you work with that man?" she gasped as she gestured over her shoulder at Chris Larabee's office.

"Yes.." he began.

The woman interrupted him by handing him the large envelope and saying softly through clenched teeth, "Well, I had an appointment with him! I'm Katherine Collins…Dr. Katherine Collins... from the Denver Office of the Medical Examiner. Please give Agent Larabee this envelope!" She turned on her heel and began to walk toward the elevator. She stopped abruptly and walked back pulling the crumpled bill out of her bra as she walked. She tossed the bill on the envelope and said, "And give this back to him, too!" She turned and took two steps, then walked back to Agent Tanner, slapped him across the face and said, "And you can give that to him also!" Then she stormed to the elevator and disappeared as the doors closed behind her.

Vin stood chuckling to himself. He always thought redheads had hot tempers! He touched his cheek where she slapped him and a huge grin spread across his face. He walked to Chris' office and knocked on the door as he opened it and entered. Chris greeted him with a growl; he hated it when they did that!

"Hey, Cowboy, you know who you just threw out of your office?" Vin asked with the huge grin still on his face.

"Yeah," said Chris hotly, "the stripper Buck was supposed to cancel!"

"No," smirked Vin, "he cancelled her. You have an appointment with Dr. Collins?"

"Yeah," replied Chris impatiently, "and he's late!"

"No," answered Vin having difficulty controlling his laughter, "Dr. Collins was just here. Left this envelope, this fifty, and a slap in the face for you." Chris quickly looked up at him, the realization beginning to hit. "The woman you threw out of your office with the unceremonious spank was Dr. Collins!"

Chris groaned and dropped his head into his hands. "I'm really gonna hear about this one…"

Vin fought it but he finally succumbed to the fit of laughter that overtook his sense of self-preservation. Despite Larabee's best glare, Vin laughed heartily! It was worth a slap in the face from that beautiful woman just to see the reaction from Chris. "Come on, Larabee, I'll buy you a birthday dinner and a beer!"

M7M7M7M7M7

The next morning, AD Travis' secretary called requesting Agent Tanner to report to Mr. Travis' office. The secretary escorted him into the office, but instead of Orin Travis, it was Dr. Katherine Collins! As soon as the door closed, Dr. Collins began talking as if she needed to complete a most uncomfortable task. "Agent Tanner, I am so sorry for my conduct last evening. I was totally out of control, which is unlike me. I cannot believe that I slapped you and I am very sorry. Please accept my sincere apology. This is my card and this is my immediate supervisor's card. They have all the information you need to file a formal complaint."

Vin accepted the cards and stared at her for a minute. He thought J.D. was the only one who could talk without breathing and it didn't surprise him that Chris thought she was a stripper. The agency only used part-time women; they all had other jobs or were full-time students. They only stripped down to string bikinis and there was no physical contact except for a departing kiss. Dr. Collins was a striking woman. Her hair, makeup and clothing were very suitable for the office, but she was also very sexy. He handed the supervisor's card back to Dr. Collins and told her, "I don't plan on filing a complaint. In a few months, you'll look back on this and laugh."

She looked at him incredulously. "You honestly think Chris Larabee can insult me like that and I'm just going to laugh about it! I heard that he had little respect for women, but that debacle was rude beyond belief!"

"Dr. Collins, please sit down," Vin said as he gestured to a chair. He sat across from her on a small sofa. "Yesterday was one of those days for Chris. And to top it off, it was his birthday. He heard that one of the agents hired a stripper. Chris immediately ordered him to cancel, but thought that he didn't."

Dr. Collins sat staring at Vin, looking confused, and waiting for him to continue.

"Chris thought that you were the stripper…" Vin said tentatively. "He expected Dr. Collins to be a man."

She continued to stare at Vin, but he believed he already said more than enough! He waited for her reaction.

"I heard many negatives about Chris Larabee and his entire team, but I prefer to make my own observations and draw my own conclusions. This is one time I'm sorry that I did!" Dr. Collins stood to leave as Travis' secretary knocked on the door and looked in.

"Please excuse me Dr. Collins and Agent Tanner, but Agent Larabee…" the secretary began, but never finished because Chris strode in. She immediately left and closed the door behind her.

"I thought Orin…" Chris began as he looked around. Then he faced Dr. Collins and said, "Dr. Collins, I have no excuse. I apologize for my behavior and especially for my assumption that you were a visitor rather than the Forensic Pathologist."

"You mean a stripper," Dr. Collins interjected.

Chris looked at Vin and Vin nodded, then he looked back at Dr. Collins. Chris rubbed his forehead, then ran his hand through his hair. "I hope you never have one of those days," Chris said earnestly. "I felt an apology was in order, but do what you have to do. I only hope that this will not interfere in the working relationship we've been attempting to establish. Again, Dr. Collins, I truly apologize." Chris turned to exit as Orin Travis entered his office.

'Well, Dr. Collins, Agents Larabee and Tanner, I do hope you three worked out any difficulties you had?" AD Travis asked as his gaze shifted around the room.

"Not totally," Chris said honestly.

"Would anyone care to fill me in on the specifics of the problem?" Mr. Travis asked cautiously.

Katherine Collins and Chris Larabee exchanged glares daring the other to give one humiliating detail!

Vin spoke as he rose from the sofa on the far side of the office, "Well, Mr. Travis, it seems that Chris was expecting a male Forensic Pathologist and when Dr. Collins entered, Chris had no patience for visitors." Both Agent Larabee and Dr. Collins stared at Vin; he made the encounter sound so simple!

Orin Travis sighed and rolled his eyes. He looked at Chris and said, "You realize that Dr. Collins is not a man, correct?" Chris nodded his head affirmatively, deciding he would stay ahead of the game if he kept his mouth shut.

Then Orin looked at Dr. Collins and said, "You do realize that every Forensic Pathologist we have had up to this point has been a man…and at least twenty years older than you?"

"Actually," said Dr. Collins, "I didn't know that, but that is still no excuse for rude behavior!"

"Agree with you wholeheartedly, Dr. Collins," Vin interjected, "no excuse for rude behavior." When she turned abruptly and looked at him, Vin grinned and winked at her.

Orin Travis looked at the three standing in his office and frowned. Something happened that no one wants to discuss, which means that it was something very serious, which means that it probably had something to do with Larabee insulting Dr. Collins. He drew in a long, slow breath and sighed just as slowly. "Dr. Collins, Agent Larabee and my daughter-in-law will be accompanying my wife, Evie, and me to the Mayor's Ball. I would consider it a personal favor if you and your escort would sit at our table. It is very important that we establish a positive working relationship; what better way than to mix a little business with pleasure!"

"Thank you Mr. Travis," Dr. Collins replied, "but I have only been in Denver for 24 hours! I was cautioned not to invite anyone from work, so I was planning on attending alone. That would be an odd number at your table, but thank you anyway."

Orin Travis looked over at Agent Tanner. Vin was enjoying this way too much! And why was he dressed so casually? Vin wore a navy blue short-sleeved T shirt and a pair of faded denim jeans. Travis' secretary - and every other woman in the entire building – stared at him when he walked past them. The clothes weren't tight, but they insinuated at the muscle beneath. Vin was taut and sinewy. He appeared slim, but his frame belied the muscle. Orin suddenly had an idea; his wife would love it!

"Dr. Collins," said Mr. Travis working desperately to keep the laughter from his voice, "it seems to me that Agent Larabee needs to prove to you that he is a good judge of character and does not denigrate women. If Agent Larabee arranges an escort for you to the Mayor's Ball, and the man is totally unsuitable, I will support you in your pursuit of whatever course of action you choose. However, if Agent Larabee arranges an agreeable escort, you must promise to forget the events of last evening. Do we have a deal?"

Katherine Collins was about to tell AD Travis that he was totally insane when she saw the look on Chris Larabee's face. He was mortified! Playing matchmaker was obviously something that Chris Larabee abhorred! Good! This was the perfect way to get a little revenge!

Trying not to look pleased, Dr. Collins looked at AD Travis and said politely, "You have a deal, Mr. Travis." They shook hands on it. "Now if you will excuse me, I have work to do!" said Dr. Collins as she smiled at Mr. Travis and smirked at Agents Larabee and Tanner.

"I'll walk you out, Dr. Collins," called Vin as he headed for the door. He wanted to leave that room before Larabee exploded!

"Thanks, Orin. Thanks a lot!" grumbled Chris sarcastically as the door closed. "A Forensic Pathologist is supposed to be some kind of genius! Who can possibly spend an entire evening with her!"

"Now Chris, don't get over-analytical, just go with your gut feeling," reassured Orin. "Who is the smartest man you know?"

"I'd have to say J.D.," Chris said thoughtfully.

"And think about the woman he dates," said Orin, "that should get you started. Now I have to get to work. You can send my car for Dr. Collins and her escort. See you tonight."

Larabee walked determinedly to his office, slammed the door, closed the blinds and sat at his desk. J.D. and Casey - funny that Dr. Collins' nickname is KC – J.D. understands things about computers and their workings that the average human brain can't even comprehend. Casey has basic computer knowledge and relies on J.D. to fix her computer problems. J.D. and Casey fish, go to the movies, rock climb, nothing to do with computers! J.D. has at least 40 I.Q. points higher than Casey, but their relationship doesn't revolve around intellectual activity. When we see them together, we just know they belong together – gut instinct!

Vin! He's respectful. Women consider him good looking. He's not physically imposing. He's a good listener. Seems to stand up to Dr. Collins. It might work...

Chris strode out of his office and into the bull pen. "Vin," Chris said slowly, "will you escort Dr. Collins to the Mayor's Ball?" All eyes turned to watch Vin's reaction. Chris and Vin stared at each other as if carrying on a private conversation. "Vin,…please?" The agents looked at each other and gasped! It was only an insurmountable obstacle that could elicit the "P" word from Larabee!

"My tux needs to be cleaned, don't know if I have a shirt – caught a bullet the last time I wore a tux, if you remember – need to polish my shoes, get a corsage…" Vin's voice trailed off.

"Mr. Tanner," drawled Ezra, "may I offer you my assistance in coordinating your preparations for this evening?"

"I'm not sure I really want to do this…" Vin said.

"You're saving my ass, Vin," said Chris. "Don't make me say the "P" word again…"

Vin hesitated; he shook his head and closed his eyes. He opened his eyes and looked at the pained expression on Larabee's face. "Okay, but don't blame me if she has a terrible evening!" groaned Vin.

Ezra drove Vin to his apartment in Purgatorio. He refused to park his car - too many questionable characters. Ezra remained in the car – with the engine running – while Vin assembled the articles on Ezra's list: tuxedo jacket and pants, studs and cuff links, vest, bow tie, shirt, shoes, socks, briefs and handkerchief. Vin would try on his tuxedo when they first arrived at The Spa for Men – Denver, then Ezra would drop the tux off at his one hour dry cleaner and assemble any additional clothing needs while Vin was getting his massage. As Vin tossed his duffel into Ezra's trunk, Ezra thought to himself, _Only Vin Tanner would pack a designer tuxedo in a military duffel bag!_

At The Spa, Vin was given a robe and slippers, then he was escorted to the locker room.

Vin's tux fit perfectly! Of course, it was because Ezra selected it for him last year. The shoes were acceptable, but he needed a new shirt, socks, handkerchief and briefs.

He enjoyed the Mountain Rain Shower, but it went downhill after that. Vin refused to allow ANY waxing of his body; not ears, eyebrows, shoulders, or back, and NEVER his chest! "No one's spreading hot wax on ANY of my body parts and then ripping out my hair by the roots! Ain't no masochist, Ezra!" roared Vin looking and sounding more like Larabee as The Spa experience continued.

The massage, facial, shave, manicure and pedicure presented Ezra with sufficient time to handle his errands. Ezra wanted to personally supervise the haircut and the selection of a deodorant/aftershave/cologne fragrance. Ezra exited the room to Vin's shout, "What d'ya mean FULL BODY MASSAGE? Where the hell are my pants?"

"Please Mr. Tanner," said the maseusse, "we do not concern ourselves with any area normally covered by swim trunks."

"Well since I'm not wearin' swim trunks, reckon I'm a little nervous," replied Vin emphatically.

Vin reclined on his back on the padded table after his "relaxing" massage. The esthetician tried to begin his facial, but Vin growled, "No goop on my face. People eat cucumbers; I ain't wearin'em! Ouch! What're you doin' to my eyebrows!"

"Mr. Tanner, please! Eyebrows are usually waxed or plucked beforehand, but you refused, so now I have to do it," whined the young woman.

Vin sympathized, but..."Ow! That's it, quit yankin'," he protested.

"Please, Mr. Tanner, I will leave your eyebrows for the barber to shave, but I must exfoliate your skin. Effleurage is very relaxing," begged the esthetician, "please just give me a chance."

Vin shut his eyes tightly, took a deep breath, opened his eyes and said, "I'm real sorry for bein' belligerent, but I have an "arranged" date for the Mayor's Ball tonight. She's an extremely intelligent and beautiful woman, and I'm just, plain scared!"

"Well, Mr. Tanner," she said matter-of-factly, "if she doesn't see your many attributes, she isn't as intelligent as you think!"

Vin smiled at her and said sheepishly, "Guess I don't mind cucumbers, after all..."

Ezra returned to the spa to hear Vin growling at the pedicurist, "Bad enough you're prissying up my fingernails, but I'm gonna wear shoes 'n socks. Nobody's gonna see my feet!" Vin glared at the barber as she used a nose hair trimmer on Vin's nostrils, earlobes and to shape his eyebrows. She tried to shave him as closely as possible with no nicks or razor burn. Ezra handed the barber the after shave he selected. "Let me smell that, first," Vin demanded.

Ezra just smiled at the barber as he said to Vin, "Mr. Tanner, please trust my judgment and refrain from disconcerting the spa's excellent staff. You are already responsible for a magnanimous gratuity."

Ezra thought he had Vin situated comfortably in the hair stylist's chair as Geoffrey discussed highlighting and cutting. Slowly Vin turned the chair around so that he was facing Geoffrey. Without removing his narrowing blue eyes from Geoffrey's widening hazel eyes, Vin growled, "Ezra, I don't want no highlights and I only want a TRIM. Make sure this man knows I carry a gun for a livin' and I ain't afraid to use it." Then he slowly turned the chair back around so that he faced the mirror again. Ezra shrugged at Geoffrey and Geoffrey reached a trembling hand for his scissors. Vin labored to keep a straight face. He was beginning to understand how much Larabee enjoyed himself!

They returned to the locker room. Ezra handed Vin his deodorant, dental supplies and cologne. After Ezra finally convinced Vin not to wear a T shirt under his pima cotton tuxedo shirt, and the trousers looked better over briefs rather than boxers, Vin proceeded to dress. The Spa Director examined Vin as he left the locker room. "My staff performed exceptionally," he commented. "I still wish you had a few highlights put in your hair and allowed your eyebrows to be waxed into shape ..." Ezra thanked the Director and shoved Vin toward the door before he had the opportunity to respond.

Vin and Ezra exited The Spa walking a gauntlet of admiring, cheering spa personnel, probably glad to be rid of Vin, but thankful for the huge tips Ezra was forced to pay if he wanted to return himself!

Before they drove to the Federal Office Building to put Vin into Orin Travis' limo, Vin said, "First have to stop at a florist for a corsage – I know what I want."

M7M7M7M7M7

It was six o' clock when Dr. Collins' door bell rang. She grabbed her shawl and evening bag and opened the door expecting Orin Travis' driver. Instead, she found Special Agent Vin Tanner, a tiny florist box in hand! A small gasp escaped her mouth; a sigh from his. They both stood facing each other, pleasantly surprised at the sight.

It was a short ride to the Cultural Center. KC presented her invitation and located AD Travis' table on the diagram. KC and Vin stood together in the doorway determining the location of the table. As they did, all eyes were on the extraordinarily handsome couple.

Vin wore a three button tuxedo jacket with a vest, wing tip collar shirt and hand-tied bow tie, but it was the wayhe wore it! His jacket was unbuttoned revealing a trim waist and slim hips. The trousers were fitted and sleek. His hair was long, shiny and casual; his face clean-shaven. His blue eyes sparkled as he smiled broadly.

KC wore an empire waist strapless black dress fitted through the midriff and flaring slightly from the hip to the floor. And again, it was the way she wore it! While the strapless neckline revealed a bit of cleavage, it alluded to ample breasts, a tiny waist and curvaceous hips. Her hair was casually piled on her head with tendrils around her face and neck. Her wrist corsage of baby white roses and Baby Breath was in perfect proportion to her delicate frame. She wore a simple gold necklace with matching bracelet, black high-heeled pumps and evening bag. KC carried a black silk hand woven lace shawl draped over her arm. Her green eyes danced and she smiled as Vin whispered in her ear, "Reckon they never saw a better lookin' couple…or I forgot to zip my fly…"

"You're fine; I checked when I noticed the stares!" KC whispered back with a laugh. They walked to Orin's table and Vin introduced KC to Mary and Evie Travis.

The evening passed quickly: dinner, speeches, dancing and the obligatory schmoozing. KC and Vin seemed to find enough to talk about and laughed often. They both trained seriously and KC owned firearms. They looked good dancing together! But, it was still a formal evening. Chris was getting antsy…and Vin wasn't much better! "Cowboy, I need a beer," Larabee grumbled to Vin, "from a mug, not a crystal Pilsner glass, with C&W blasting in the background."

"I hear ya, Larabee," muttered Vin. "The others are probably at the saloon for Karaoke night."

Mary rolled her eyes and scolded the two, "Karaoke is totally passé; enjoy the music; dance!" Chris rolled his eyes, stood and held Mary's chair while she rose and led him to the dance floor.

Vin looked at KC. She looked excited as she said, "Karaoke might be totally passé, but it's also a totally good time! Do you sing?"

"After a few beers," laughed Vin, "but never alone!"

"Good," said KC, "then you can sing with me! I'll even let you pick the music!"

"You're on! Let me tell the others," Vin said rising. "Be right back!"

In a few minutes, Vin returned. He held KC's chair as she rose, and they said a few goodbyes on their way to the door. "Chris and Mary, at least Chris, will join us, and so will Orin and Evie. They'll meet us there."

Vin and KC caused quite a stir when they entered J. Watson's in formal attire! The team immediately called them over to their table. Vin introduced KC to the others and Ezra took her hand as he said, "My dear Dr. Collins, gazing upon you atones for Mr. Tanner's boorish conduct at The Spa earlier today; I dare say The Spa will no longer accept my referrals without a prior interview!"

"Thank you, Agent Standish, I appreciate your diligent efforts," smiled KC. And with that, Ezra kissed her hand before releasing it. "So, what do you want to sing?" KC asked Vin. "Quick, get the man a few beers!" she said jokingly.

Vin disappeared and returned with a pitcher and extra glasses. The others were surprised, and pleased, that KC drank beer. Chris, Mary, Orin and Evie entered and approached the table as Vin signed on to the karaoke list. Amazing how those seven can find empty chairs! Chris ordered white wine for Mary and Evie, and picked up another pitcher for the table.

Vin and KC put their heads together to discuss their song; they didn't have much time, it was a short list. Vin said, "Don't have enough beer in me yet! Gotta loosen this collar!" He suddenly realized that he just might be making a fool of himself in front of this woman, and he really didn't want to do that!

Vin and KC were called to sing and Vin looked panic stricken! KC grabbed Vin's jacket and put it over the back of his chair. She untied his tie, but left it hanging around his neck. Her nimble fingers quickly removed four studs and she dropped them into her purse before placing it in Ezra's charge. KC spread the front of Vin's shirt slightly to show a little skin (and chest hair), used her fingers to fluff the top of his hair over his forehead, then she grabbed Vin's hand and led him to the stage. They were singing, " A Bad Goodbye" – Vin was no Clint Black and KC was no Wynona, but it was just for fun, and they looked great together.

Vin began singing, a little shaky at first, but at the sound of the first screams and shrieks as women turned toward the stage and caught sight of him, his voice became smooth and steady. Perhaps it was his realization that they thought he was drop-dead gorgeous, but probably, it was just his attempt to sing louder than their screams. The first chorus sounded good; Vin held the melody while KC sang harmony. Then KC sang; it was sweet and melodious. The second chorus was even better and they built up to a strong finish. At the very end, the two faced each other as if they could determine the harmony by watching each other's eyes. In any case, it seemed to work. They were both caught up in the experience and as they finished singing the last word, "Goodbye," they lowered their microphones and softly kissed.

If the crowd wasn't cheering loudly enough at the end of the song, the kiss resulted in thunderous applause, whoops and whistles!

Chris reached over and shook Orin's hand. "You called that one right," Chris shouted above the din.

Orin shouted back, "You selected the escort; you made the right call. But Chris, whatever you did to make her so angry, don't ever do it again, even if it is one of those days!"

The End


	2. Chapter 2

Epilogue

Chris and Orin relaxed in the Travis' den after the Mayor's Ball. They smoked Orin's superior cigars and sipped an equally fine single malt.

Perhaps it was the success of the evening, or maybe his reaction to the alcohol, but Orin had to ask. "Chris," Orin began, "I know you're not a misogynist…"

"Hell, no, Orin," laughed Larabee, "you know I'm Methodist!" Then he sat smirking to himself, pleased at Orin's reaction.

"Very funny, Chris," said a mildly amused Orin.

Travis looked at him nervously over the rim of his glass and began again. "I know you don't feel the need to defend yourself or explain your actions, but I need to know! Did you really say that women don't belong on the police force or ATF?" Orin actually held his breath as he waited.

Larabee watched his friend and thought about the countless times Travis supported the team, and especially Chris, even when the facts were against them, the innumerable times Travis acted on Larabee's word alone. Guess he owed him that much.

"Orin," Chris stated solemnly, "I don't think women fit easily into any violent situation. Men tend to 'protect' them – it's our instinct – right or wrong, it's there. Maybe if I did a better job with Sarah and Adam…"

Orin watched Chris grapple for a few seconds before he continued.

"I knew Shane Cole; he was protecting his partner rather than working with her or watching her back. And a female agent on Team 2 was a poor placement. Those guys kept tripping all over themselves trying to impress her, but didn't utilize her talents or expertise. They put her into a bad situation and she paid the price. Shit, Orin, it's hard enough to assimilate any new placement, but when you have to watch your hands during defensive training, and your mouth in the office, and your eyes when she has a short skirt or low neckline, well, let's just say that it takes a super- intelligent, patient and qualified woman! I'm not saying a woman doesn't belong; I'm just saying it's not easy."

Orin seemed satisfied with that, but…"What about Dr. Collins?"

Chris rubbed his forehead, then ran both hands simultaneously through his hair. "You had to be there," Chris said as he shifted himself forward in his chair and looked at Orin. "She walked, no, she sauntered, into my office with this enticing smile on her face. She put a cassette player on my desk – like she was going to play some music. She told me that she was going to make me a very happy man! She told me to call her KC – not Dr. Collins – not KC Collins! Orin, I never met her before! I swear everyone referred to Dr. Collins as 'he!' And she smelled way to good to be a Forensic Pathologist!"

Chris sat back and leaned on one arm of the chair. "Josiah has the psychological jargon, but what it boils down to is this: I was expecting a male Forensic Pathologist who looked exactly like the two before him, and half-expecting a female stripper, so that's what I saw."

Uncharacteristically, Chris kept talking, "I need to apologize again, on her own territory, and I need to give her a token of some kind. If she was a man, I wouldn't hesitate to take a bottle of this single-malt. Flowers and wine are more feminine, but they're what a man gives to his wife or girlfriend to apologize. It's probably going to backfire, but at least you know my reasoning."

Chris drained his glass, set it down solidly and said, "I'm making an appointment to see Dr. Collins on Monday morning. I'm taking a bottle of Scotch and her report. After I apologize, I'm going to grovel a little, if necessary, to learn as much from that autopsy report as possible." He looked at Orin with a combination of exasperation, helplessness and determination.

"Good luck, Chris," chuckled Orin, "I think you're going to need it!" Then he refilled both of their glasses.

THE END


End file.
